Give Your Feeling Its Rights

As human being, we cannot escape from going through bad days. Sadness, grief, misery and sorrow are all natural feelings which are a part and parcel of this life. There are grief, sadness, setbacks, failures, loss of loved ones and heartache in each of our own personal lives. Fortunately, Allah has created human beings are naturally resilient, considering most of us can endure sadness or loss and then continue on with our own lives. However, some people may struggle with grief for longer periods of time and feel unable to carry out daily activities. In the end, some people might think they’re not being a good Muslim. They feel they cannot be sad upon the losses and need to move on. They thought that being grief is symbolizing their weaken faith to God. Is it true?

I strongly believe that Islam never restrict us from being sad or grief. Islam does not say we cannot cry. In fact, being sad even for days never make us less ‘Muslim’. During this hard time, a grief response is completely normal. I personally thought, giving our feeling its rights is crucial. It means, when we are sad, we have to acknowledge the feeling. We can cry, we can stop talking to people, we can stay alone in our room for days even though we might be starving in the end. Do anything that shows we are being sad. It’s okay as long as we did not do any harm to ourselves. Even, the feeling of aches would be still there but at least we give ourselves some space and time to heal the wound. Healing needs process and it takes time.

I remember in the seerah of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ himself who experienced many losses, tribunals and hardship throughout his life and taught us that grief is a real and natural emotional response. He loss both of his wife Khadijah (ra) and his uncle Abu Talib in one year called ‘The Year of Sorrow’. He loss 6 out of 7 of his children during his lifetime. He also loss numerous companions and friends in his da’wah journey. Prophet Ya’akub extremely sad at the loss of his son, Prophet Yusuf until that his eyes turned blind. They are prophet who being tested with the most trials and tribunals of human life. That does not make them far from Allah. They are in fact the closest person to Him because of their patience and strong belief to Allah’s rewards.

To someone who might feel lose, loss your beloved ones or disappointed with all happening around, it’s human to have all those feelings (sad and grief). Give your feeling its rights and acknowledge the feeling. Seeking help from the authority person is also a right for your feelings to heal. Slowly okay?

Written by:

Nuha Farhana